Monday, May 12, 2014


There is so much to be gained from a sunny weekend! I definitely feel better, though I am still counting down to the end of the school year. My students say there are four weeks left, but it's really five- though I suppose it depends on what you're counting. I'm really wishing for my mother-in-law's home schooling schedule- school starts after Labor Day and ends at Memorial Day. September through May sounds perfect to me... But to get that schedule and still be working outside the home, I'd have to go back to school and get my master's degree- it's nearly a college schedule, which I totally love. 

I go back and forth every few weeks/months. Going back to school sounds extremely tedious, but I would love teaching college classes. E and I go back and forth, but ultimately we know God will work things out for us, for the best. 

I have to constantly remember the sunny weekends, to keep me going through the week. My depression has waxed and waned, but usually gets worse when I am vulnerable at home. Those are the times when I don't need to hide things from my students and coworkers. I've had two 'breakdowns' this week, and am finally warming up to the counseling idea. With the baby, E is really reluctant to go the medication route. It's been a tough road, and every time we think things are looking up, I go downhill again. Job stress is probably the major trigger right now.

Remembering the nice peaceful days, the days of pleasant weather, help me to refocus a bit. Prayers are always appreciated. It's hard for me to come to terms with this- it's one of those things that I always thought would never happen to me. Admitting and accepting it is the first step. 

Remember the sunshine. 

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